Dear Mann Landers,
I can’t get over a girl that I’ve unsuccessfully chased after for nearly a decade. My friends get annoyed with the whole thing and don’t understand what the big deal is. In my head no one else measures up. As a result I just don’t have any interest in dating anyone else.
How can I get over this girl?
Sincerely,
The One That Got Away, in Lancaster
**************************************************************
Dear The One That Got Away,
It’s time to put her in the ground. No no no - I’m not talking about taking out a hitman on her … I’m talking about having a love funeral for the idea of you two being together.
When you lose someone you’ve loved, or in this case “loved the idea of”, it can leave you bitstrated (bitter + frustrated). That’s why you have funerals.
The purpose of a funeral is twofold:
- Declares the death of a loved one (or in this case the idea of the relationship)
- Memorializes the loved one’s life
What do you do at a love funeral?
It’s meant to be a celebration of the “love” that you’re burying! Play “your” song on repeat, write down a little speech that summarizes all the characteristics that you loved about her, think of all the good things that she brought out of you, etc.
These are the things you want to walk away from the love funeral with. This is why you have a love funeral - so you don’t just sit around being bitstrated (bitter + frustrated).
*Note: the saying that “we’re all like snowflakes, no two are the same” is really a bit of a farce… yes we are all different, but we’re far less unique then that famous saying would suggest. Chances are that you’ll be able to find a girl that you’ll love the idea of just as much, and when it’s reciprocated the two of you can combine your snowflakes into a snowball of love. (<—- sorry I’m really tired as I write this one)
You’re welcome,
Mann Landers
