Dear Mann Landers,
I’ve realized that one of my weaker skills as a player in the game is the pick-up line. Although I’ve set myself up with some phenomenal ice breakers in the past, in all reality I tend to be shy and not trust my well rounded character and appearance. I haven’t mastered the art of charm solely because I lack the creativity to kick off a conversation with that pretty lady at the front desk, the cute but quiet cashier, the sexy runner beside me at the gym. The reward: her number, the requirement: a way with words. A few of the lines you’ve successfully used in the past would be nice, but your advice on how to brainstorm, by yourself, dialog unique to the situation would be even more appreciated.
Sincerely,
Speechless, in Ohio
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Dear Speechless,
Here’s your real problem: you’re keeping your eye on the prize.
I know, you’ve been told your entire life that focus is a good thing and will lead to success. This is often true, and if you are looking for the most efficient and effective ways of picking up girls, books like The Game will provide you with proven pick-up strategies.
Personally, however, I think that keeping your eyes on the prize can be a mistake in the dating world. Following a pick-up formula might increase your success, but it also takes the fun out of meeting people. By focusing on getting a number, you’ll risk losing the chance to actually, you know, get to know someone.
That aside, let me reveal something: That pretty girl at the front desk gets hit on by every guy who walks through the office, and the sexy runner at the gym has thought about cancelling her membership because of all the pick-up lines dropped on her. If you think you’re about to run game on her she hasn’t yet heard, you might be surprised. The best strategy you can employ is to be real, say something genuine, and don’t measure success in black and white (phone number/no phone number). There’s no need to put so much pressure on yourself when you’re just being yourself, and enjoying yourself as you meet new people. The phone numbers will come, but you shouldn’t view them as the be all, end all.
You’re welcome,
Mann Landers